My ever active mind, is constantly rolling from one topic to the next, but for me, there is never a dull moment. So... my new topic for conversation and comment is this: "How to teach Etiquette to kids". Now you might be thinking, kids are way too young to teach certain things to, but I think that if parents begin young, then the child's behavior will be so much better both at home and in public. With that said, Here are my questions for you to think about and comment on:
1. "How do you teach your young children to not stare, point, or make unkind and uncomfortable comments about individuals they see who are handicapped, or have some condition that gives them obvious difference in their appearance?"
This is a difficult question, but even harder if you think about it in reverse. Let's say you are the mother of the child who is different in some way, and you see other peoples children starring, making fun, pointing, laughing at, following your child around in the store. As the mother....
2. "How do you act or react to those children who say these unkind things"? Do you talk to those children or the parent they are with about it? Do you ignore it? Do you defend your child's dignity? What would you do?
I have posed this question because I have seen so many uncomfortable situations, when this happens, over and over to people with difference. It isn't just the children who can be cruel with their taunting and unkindness, it can be adults as well.
One day, as I was in Old Navy looking to purchase some cute little clothes for my granddaughter, a woman walked into the store and was pushing her new baby in a cart. This woman was very short statured, and immediately, a little child, began to point and loudly tell his mother to "Look at her, Mom, see that little Mommy". That child said it over and over to the point of nauseym, and his mother ignored him, probably because she was uncomfortable and didn't know what to say. To the credit of this short statured woman, she ignored the words, and moved on, pushing her baby in the cart, and pretending to not let the degrading words of a child bother her.
Only a minute or two later, another child noticed this little woman, and had a horrified look on his face. I watched him look this little woman over, up and down, still with a horrified look on his face. For me, enough was enough, and I moved myself between the boy and this little woman, so that he could not see her, and she not see him. She said nothing, and continued to shop, however this little boy, positioned himself, walking around the clothing stands, so that he could continue to stare at this woman. I looked around and there was no mother in site and I wondered who this little boy belonged to. He continued to follow around this little woman until she finally told him to go find his mother, and he did.
My heart ached for this little woman, and I knew that this had to be her lot in life, and that most likely each time she went somewhere in public, she was treated poorly, by perfect strangers and I am sure that it wasn't just children who would behave this way.
One thing that often worked well with my children was opening a controlled conversation between them and the person for whom they were showing signs of curiosity about. For example, once at the grocery store there was a man in a wheelchair who had an amputated leg. Instead of ignoring him and hoping my children wouldn't say anything hurtful, I smiled at him and asked if he had served in the armed forces. That opened up a conversation in front of my children where he could tell them how he got his "owie" and I could thank him for his service and tell my children how brave he was.
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